Sometimes I wish people can just focus on the good side of everything. (Sometimes I need to remind myself to do that.)
I have a student who is a bit rough – in terms of language and attitude. However, I think he also feels that people don’t respect him and therefore he needs to put up this tough face because with me, he is polite (more polite, more often) and less confrontational. I think that even with adults (not just kids), they become what you expect. If you expect him/her to be rude then he or she will seem rude.
Kind of reminds me of some of the things talked about in this article:
Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior
Now, I believe that there should be a balance. At the same time there are things you can learn and take with you (maybe not to the same extent) from parents of different cultures. Of course, all children are different and therefore the way to raise them is not the same.
My dad was a “Chinese Father”, kind of the male equivalent of the “Chinese Mother”. My brother and I did not benefit from it. My self-esteem was very low as a child. I’m ALWAYS afraid to do things wrong and I think that’s why I beat myself up (mentally) when I make mistakes now. I dwell too much on errors. I am better now. I am able to better manage my stress by focusing on what I can do now (not what I have done).
Just like food, everything in moderation – BALANCE!